8/15/2005

Thoughts on Baldness

I bought a beer tonight and the fellow carded me. He said it was "sick" that I looked so young. Before I responded that my youthful appearance could be attributed to "clean living," I realized that I only enjoyed such comments when buying an Anheuser Busch product, hardly the stuff of Jack LaLane's wet dreams.

So, I figured it must be a result of my baldness. Self imposed, of course. So when I got home I looked at myself, and I think I've got it. Ugly men of all ages and egos convince themselves they are good looking by having large swishes of hair all around. Only when this contrived prop is removed from one's head do you really realize that looks...just...ain't...it. And at that point you can find the confidence to smile like a 22 year old.

That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.