2/09/2007

School Superintendent

Our very capable Dr. Bryan Dunn will be replaced by Cheryl Crawley. Ms. Crawley comes from Marin County, California.

I think she might feel a little out of place, since she comes from a very liberal, wealthy county.

You know you're from Marin County when...

- It's a bigger deal to come out as a Republican than to come out of the closet.

- Your parents make $120,000 a year, yet you're still considered middle class.

- You know the difference between Thai, Vietnamenese, Chinese, Japanese, Cantonese, and Korean food.

- Left is right and right is wrong.

- Your typical weekend night is spent in a hot tub...

- ...or driving around looking for a party.

- None of your friends are around over school breaks because they're either off in Europe or Hawaii, or spending time up at their Tahoe homes.

- Every car at your school either has a bumper sticker for Kerry 2004 or one with the name of a prestigious college...or both.

- The hippy crowd at your school makes up the majority of the school's population.

- There are more hybrid cars at your school than there are black people.

-You have been stopped by cops for being out past curfew.

- Parties are consistently broken up by 11.

- You know the difference between a Cabernet and a Sauvignon Blanc...before you turn thirteen.

- You spent your Saturday nights as a seventh grader at Bar and Bat Mitzvah parties.

- You regularly eat at vegan or organic restaurants

- You can't imagine going to college parties and having to drink cheap ass beer for once.

Wow. Sounds just like Great Falls!

(Just kidding. Welcome to town!)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM MONTANA IF…..

Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor and combine crew on the highway

"Vacation" means driving through Glacier or Yellowstone Park or going back to school shopping in Billings .

You've seen all the biggest bands ten years after they were popular.

You measure distance in hours not miles.

You've been to a tractor rally.

Down south to you means Wyoming .

Minneapolis is "back East", Washington is "the coast".

You know people who have hit deer, elk, moose or cattle.

You know who has to pay for the damage to your truck and the dead cow if you hit one.

Your school classes were canceled because of cold, but only when it was-40F or colder and the schools boiler ran out of coal.

You know what a red beer and a whiskey ditch are.

You think the best beers available on the market today are Ranier, Oly, and Coors. You're still mad that Great Falls Select is no longer made.

You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way.

You've had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.

You've seen people wear bib overalls at funerals.

You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it no matter what time of the year.

You often reply "you bet!" or "hell yes!"

The festivals across the state are named after fruits, vegetables, grain or testicles.

You've gotten a "To Go" drink from the local bar.

You've stopped by the local bar to cash a check.

You install security lights on your house and barn and leave both unlocked.

Think of the major four food groups as beef, pork, beer, and Jell-O salad with marshmallows.

You know what "Cow Tipping", "Garden Raiding" or "Snipe Hunting" are.

You carry jumper cables in your car.

You only own 3 spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup.

You understand that it is simply not proper to put ketchup or steak sauce on a good steak.

You know someone who's lost their license due to a DUI and have seen their tractor or snowmobile parked at the local bar.

You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

You've gone to the grocery store on a snowmobile.

Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.

Driving in the winter is often simply a matter of staying between the fence posts.

You think that washing your pickup is a waste of time and money.

You have never owned a vehicle that did not have cracks in the windshield.

You think everyone from a bigger city is stuck up.

You've attempted to set a new land speed records on Montana 's highways.

You think sexy winter lingerie is a flannel nightie and tube socks.

You know how many cords of wood it will take to get through the winter.

The local paper covers national and international headlines on one page but requires 6 pages for High School Sports.

You think that the opening of elk season should be a national holiday.

You carry a roll of toilet paper in the glove box in case you have to stop and go by the road.

You find -20 degrees F "a little chilly".

You know all 4 seasons: Almost Winter, Winter, Still Winter, and Construction.

You know what a real Rocky Mountain Oyster is, and have a recipe for them.

You know someone who's shot themselves accidentally.